That moment when you’ve bottled up so much emotion and feelings and it comes pouring out when you’re trying to make a point

Every. Damn. Time

What happens when they become your entire life, and you can’t let them go?

I lived this day complaining about having to shovel the snow in my driveway and not wanting to help out around the house. But what would happen if I - really - couldn’t help out anymore? I just found out that one of my closest friends throughout highschool just passed away. 

I don’t know why, and I suppose it’s my own fault for not keeping in touch with him. We stopped talking about 2-3 years ago. I didn’t even know he got accepted into college, or that he was actually doing something with his life. I let him go (figuratively) when I started highschool, because I thought that hanging around with people who weren’t ambitious would only bring me down. But he was the only friend from highschool who never judged any of my actions, or decisions. And even if we didn’t talk for months at a time, he would always be one of the first to say Happy Birthday and do something a little out of his way that day for me.

There isn’t anything I regret more right now than not being able to say goodbye or for thanking him for all the times he helped me in highschool. He helped me overcome so many obstacles, and I’ll never forget him for that. He was a good person, and he never even got to live his life yet. Life isn’t fair.

RIP. Barry Dejonge ♥

I have another job interview tomorrow. Do I really want to go? No.

My boyfriend checks out other girls more than he pays attention to me, lol.

I’ve been coughing my lungs out the last week or so and I finally took Buckley’s today. I feel so much better, but damn does this shit taste like floor wax.

If there’s one thing I hate, it’s people who can’t admit their wrong.

aitakeru

Interview went well, but I realized I don’t even want this job.. hm.

Let’s see how tomorrow’s interview goes. I definitely want this one more.

Have you ever had that feeling where you’re so caught up with your future that you totally forget to just stop, breath, and do you? (Yeah lame Drake insert.) Seriously though.

I’ve been working 2 jobs since January, and now I have a third. I’ve been so caught up with making money and establishing my ‘work experience’ that I haven’t been thinking about myself and how I look, or feel.

I’ve adapted bad habits like a) relying on coffee to stay awake, b) procrastinating on [home] work because I need to finish the movie I watched on the commute home.

Ugh. Oh, and I barely have any real friends who stuck with me through all of that.

What now?

Going to Vancouver on the 17th! Excited :) 


I’ve deleted all but 2 people on Draw Something. If you’re good, then play with me @aitakeru

My 5-year-old Betta is sitting at the bottom of the bowl on it’s side. Google says it’s going to die soon, and now I’m upset.

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Camille Aitakeru
Freelance Journalist, graphic designer
Business inquiries: camilleaitakeru@gmail.com

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